Friday, March 25, 2005

Whiiiiiiinnnneeeeee.........

That is the sound on this, the night of the full moon.

I do not know. I am not sure. But it is looking fairly certain that the Powers that Be want me to extend my celibacy. For another quarter-year.

I try not to be a bad diviner. I try to read even my own cards honestly. But I reviewed a couple of spreads done at the same time as the main one, and it looks to me like I misjudged, intentionally or not, the right date, spiritually, to release the binding I placed upon myself.

Basically, I am being called upon to do a year declared, instead of backdating it to the having of the sex, as before.

This may seem weird, since really nothing is compelling me. But at the same time, all the things I believe in ARE compelling me, and if I'm not responsible enough to take what I'm being told as truth, then I just ought to hang up my cards and my coins and go back to Sunday school.

And this really sucks. Because I love sex, and I want sex, and that's why I have to keep not having sex, because I'm not ready to behave myself responsibly in a spiritual fashion.

Gently falling raindrop, we've moved from "Damn you" to "No, FUCK YOU!" complete with Judd Nelson impersonation. And denim jacket with cut off sleeves.

Off to do MORE divinations, to see if I have any wiggle room. Chances are I don't, but best to be thorough. Is this how The Ren Reb feels when it's time for Pesach?

3 Comments:

At 2:03 AM, Blogger Memphis Word Nerd said...

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At 2:04 AM, Blogger Memphis Word Nerd said...

I'm having a sleepless night so I decided to watch Craig Ferguson (Bleh! Bad choice but his accent is sooo hot). His guest tonight said something about "Conversations with my Father", which of course made me think of you and Your Muslim. I came running over here to post and lo and behold, there's a new post!

I'll go read it now...but I'm still crossing my fingers that we'll get to hear more from Your Muslim soon. Oh, and more kitty pictures. Don't make me post bad limericks here like I did over at SS's blog; they've been known to make English teachers around the nation break into hysterical sobbing.

Off to read...and hopefully to sleep, particularly if Craig is as dull as usual.

Your recent writing renaissance has inspired me to blog again; I posted again tonight.

 
At 5:53 PM, Anonymous Lady Alambil said...

Judd Nelson is fucking harsh! *smiles* Good luck with the rest of your celibacy.
"Because I love sex, and I want sex, and that's why I have to keep not having sex, because I'm not ready to behave myself responsibly in a spiritual fashion."
Amen, sister. That's something I'm working on figuring out myself.

 

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